I have always believed that while we may have our own grandiose plans for our lives, there is always that “X” factor, wholly uncontrollable, that either puts the proverbial monkey wrench to all the “best laid plans” or sets out a path that was totally not thought of.
What I am saying is, destiny and fate shall always intervene and reminds us that there are things greater than us that determine the course our lives shall take.
I mistakenly thought that winning was a done deal and all that was needed to be worked upon was to set the margin higher to eliminate all possible protests should there be the eventual proclamation. The discontent was palpable and the demand for change was ringing all through out the town. Caucuses showed the hubby had all but the consensus. The greater efforts were towards ensuring that the lead candidate for the top position would be carried by the then apparent wave of popularity my better half enjoyed. The possibility of losing never entered my mind and back up plans of such an eventuality were never made.
But it was not meant to be and my hubby faced his first ever loss in his 12-year political career. The three days after E-day passed like a blur and he had to face scores of supporters and leaders who came one after the other conducting the requisite "post-mortem", the questions of how and where we went wrong. So, like a true leade, after the battle was lost he took on the dificult job of lifting the morale of his defeated troops. Licking his wounds in private had to take a back seat for a while no matter how much he was itching to get away from it all. I watched him take on a very brave front although I knew deep inside he was hurting.
And for that I started hating the world of politics. I saw soon enough how the sacrifices he made did not amount to anything and how service to the people could never be appreciated in a community whose cries for change got lost in a sea of "green", money and money was all that mattered.
I never fit the model of a politician's wife. I was, still am, fiercely protective of my privacy and was uncomfortable letting in strangers of different stripes and colors into the hubby's home and being made to act like each and everyone is my best friend. But I tried my best because notwithstanding my reluctance, I had to be supportive all the way.
Now this loss. Frankly, I do not know how to deal with it and I know the hubby will find it difficult to change careers mid-stream. Yet it is in these difficult times that we also discover the most important things in life, the one constant that remain unaffected by the changing winds fortunes, political or otherwise. in the end, its all that matters.